I've Started Doing 'Grief Math' When I Think About My Future

I've Started Doing 'Grief Math' When I Think About My Future

Business Insider technology

Key Points:

  • The author reflects on the emotional impact of being in a relationship with a partner 17 years older, highlighting the challenges of confronting mortality and the passage of time after 11 years together.
  • The sudden death of the author's mother at 69 intensified worries about the future, leading to "grief math"—calculating how much time might be left with her partner, Max, who is now 57.
  • Despite these fears, Max remains energetic and active, pursuing his passion as a DJ, while the author grapples with concerns about potential caregiving roles and the possibility of being alone later in life.
  • Open communication with Max helps the author cope, and moments of anxiety give way to appreciation for their present time together, emphasizing the importance of living in the moment.
  • Their recent move to Italy to be near Max's aging parents deepens their commitment, but the author acknowledges that time is uncertain and choosing to focus on worst-case scenarios can detract from the time they currently share.

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