My Friend Has Big Plans for Our Toddlers. Uh, This Isn’t Happening.

Key Points:

• A Slate parenting advice column addresses a mother frustrated that her son and her friend Beth's son, who have very different personalities, are expected to be lifelong friends despite frequent conflicts during playdates.
• The advice suggests paying close attention to the quiet child's feelings and preferences, encouraging communication about whether he enjoys the playdates, and setting boundaries accordingly.
• It recommends maintaining the adult friendship with Beth through child-free hangouts and gently challenging Beth's assumptions about the boys' friendship without forcing a particular outcome.
• In a separate letter, a mother concerned about her son calling her "Kitty" (like his friend's mom) is advised to firmly but calmly insist he calls her "Mom," making it a non-negotiable rule without showing upset or punishment.
• The advice emphasizes that children's social preferences and expressions evolve, and parents can guide respectful communication and relationships while respecting their children's individuality.