I Keep Having to Turn Down the Men Who Are Eager to Sleep With Me. It Hurts Us Both.

Key Points:

• An older gay man treated for prostate cancer seeks advice on how to disclose his inability to get hard but still experience dry orgasms before casual sex encounters; the column suggests using labels like "bottom" or "cocksucker" on apps or discussing preferences during pre-sex conversations without necessarily detailing medical history upfront.
• A 38-year-old woman experiencing low sexual desire due to stress, depression, and exhaustion from parenting and work asks for guidance; the advice highlights stress as a common libido suppressant and recommends counseling, medication, or exploring asexuality, while also addressing how to communicate and negotiate with her husband about differing sexual needs.
• A reader complains about her husband refusing to kiss her after she gives him oral sex until she brushes her teeth; the column attributes this to possible masculinity issues or discomfort with the act, suggesting accepting his preference as a minor concession or exploring underlying feelings if possible.
• The column encourages readers to share their stories and engage in ongoing discussions about sex and relationships, emphasizing openness and communication as key to navigating complex intimate situations.