I’m confused

Trigger warning for mentions of suicide

"Hey _____! I hope you're having a good day. Unfortunately I don't think we'll be able to talk for much longer. So I just wanted to tell you everything I think you should know before then. My dream job was to be a writer. Make books for as long as my fingers could hold a pen. Writing was always one of my strong suits, been writing since I was at least five. I have never actually had a partner before, and I always thought what it would be like to have one. Maybe I'll be lucky next time. I have a pretty bad fear of heights. Anything below fifteen feet and I immediately start to shake lol. I have always wanted to go to _____. I heard it was a pretty good place. I'm sorry for not being strong, strong enough to keep going at least. I just hope you know that you have been the only thing keeping me afloat from everything I've been going through. So thank you. I wish I could have done something in return, but I don't think I'll be able to do anything for much longer. I love you. I love you dearly. That's why I want you to know that none of this was your fault, you did everything you could and I'm eternally grateful for it. I just can't keep going anymore. Maybe we could eat hello kitty marshmallows one day. I wish it was sooner, but that's how life goes. Have a great life. I hope you have the best lifetime filled with nothing but happiness. I love you."

That was the last message he sent to me two days ago. I cut out a few personal parts, but that's just about the whole thing. He blocked me on all platforms besides the one he messaged me on, and his sister blocked me too. Do you think he's gone forever? I can't tell if he's taking another mental break from the internet or taking his life or leaving me.